19 February 2015

Epic Pumps

When discussing the gym recently I was recommended a product, a pre-workout, that will supposedly make my workout more effective and last longer. I'm a beginner when it comes to the gym so I'm not jumping head first into supplements but thought I'd check this one out.

It's called Warrior Rage1 and whilst the nutritional info had me scratching my head it's the description that really got my head spinning. I mean really, is this the kind of tactic used to sell to muscle heads? To me it sounds a little shallow and pathetic.

"Are you ready to not just beast your next workout, but obliterate it? To not just beat a personal record, but smash it?! Are you ready to show the world what you're really, REALLY capable of? 
If you're not, this isn't for you. Walk away. If it is... if you're a serious athlete, with serious intentions, the Warrior RAGE is the only pre-workout you need to consider.  
Let me put it this way, here are the facts: No other pre-workout has been designed so comprehensively to build muscle, control cortisol, enhance focus, energy, drive, pump and endurance. No other pre-workout also makes all these powerful ingredients taste DELICIOUS! Warrior RAGE isn't just a pre-workout, it's a Weapon. Next time you want to smash a training session, LOAD UP!"

"...this isn't for you. Walk away" and "isn't just a pre-workout, it's a Weapon" I think might be my favourite parts.

On the other hand this is both a fantastic parody and a much better sales pitch.

"What's in it? INGREDIENTS"
"The answer that's never been a question"

I don't think I've laughed as hard in a while.

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